I feel like that a bit, that languishing in the Psalms and speaking of believing it, but not feeling it, and then writing about it all is unbecoming of who I am. But, it is just for a time, as I am in recovery from an illness of sorts. I actually turned to the Vade Mecum, which is the manual used by priests when visiting the sick.
I have an old copy of it, 57 years old, that I must have picked up at a book sale, and tonight while inventorying my books, it caught my eye.
Below is the excerpt from The Priest’s Vade Mecum, “Services and Devotions with the Sick”, section V. “A Form of Thanksgiving for Recovery”. It is to be administered by a priest, of course, to the one who is afflicted. But we are all made priests since the temple veil was torn and we now have direct access to the Father. So, I am administering this to myself, which is being done in my head, and not with mirrors:)
Perhaps by my writing, it may bless you too. That is my hope, and if true, it becomes my joy.
Glory be to thee, O heavenly Father, for all thy mercies to me . . . It is good for me that I have been in trouble, that I may learn from thy statutes. I called upon the Lord in trouble, and the Lord heard me at large.
This time of trouble is unbecoming and is instead becoming very near to Beauty. I like that, and I am fairly excited by the prospect of my writing being a reflection of the change.
Here is some music to mark the transition from the unbecoming of that old conduct.
May it be to you as it is to me.
Here’s to evergreen dreams:
Photograph “Soon a Smile” © 2018 Timothy Waugh